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The Characteristics of True Friends

Written by Cory Miller on July 30, 2015

Last Updated on July 30, 2015

At the recommendation of Shaun Achor, author of the fabulous book The Happiness Advantage (which we gave to our entire team), I’ve been working on my 21-day, 21-person Thank You list (more on that in a later #WProsper post).

But in the course of that exercise, I wrote this post on Investing in Friendships for Post Status, and I started thinking, What makes a friend a true friend?

Just looking over my Thank You list gave me plenty of inspiration. And so I started writing those down and here are the characteristics I gave them (and why I cherish them in my life):

  • Love, like the unconditional, universal kind.
  • Caring, always there ready to lend a shoulder to cry or be carried on.
  • Support, the affirmation and security of knowing no matter what happens or you do, they are there to support you.
  • Encouragement, my best friendships and relationships are the most encouraging and uplifting kind, at all times, no matter how hair-brained my ideas are.
  • Consistency, they just show up and are present throughout my life, no matter the situation, but especially in bad and my worst times.
  • Unselfish and selfless, they just wanted my best … and most often only want my friendship and time, love and support.
  • Trust, absolute confidence, I know if I share something with them, they are.
  • Truth, they aren’t liars, but rather give me honest, loving feedback, never seeking to mislead me.
  • Non-judgmental/Acceptance, they aren’t my judge and jury, but rather my defenders and allies.

But all in all, for me:

A true friend simply offers unwavering love and support.

Additionally, I also found a great post on healthy relationships …

The 8 keys he gives are:

  1. Taking interest
  2. Acceptance and respect
  3. Benefit of the doubt
  4. Meeting basic needs (companionship/belonging, affection, emotional support & validation)
  5. Proportion of positive interactions
  6. Solve problems
  7. Rupture & repair
  8. Reciprocity

Those are so good. And if you reflect on your BEST relationships I imagine you’ll see these too.

I know the quality of my life and happiness is directly proportionate to the quality of healthy relationships I have.

With great, healthy relationships like these, I am more confident in who I am … and as a consequence, more successful.

Thinking about these characteristics of true friends help me find more of them!

How about you? Who are your most important friendships and why?

Cory Miller
Cory Miller

Founder of iThemes.com

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